At first I wondered if my mother was sad or happy to see me, because you can’t really tell when somebody’s crying just like that. She pretty much cleared any doubts I had when she jumped gracefully in my arms and almost hugged me to death, hearing her cry my father ran to the door to see what was happening and I think he almost shed a tear too when he saw me. I was glad they were still there and that they have been missing me too and I think I cried a little too with them. My daughter looked at us and pouted, she said something like ‘So older people still cry too?’, I turned around and told her that crying isn’t a child thing, it’s just that older people tend to keep their feelings for themselves. My parents finally noticed my daughter and with an interrogative look they asked me who she was, even if they probably had their little idea. I told them that she was my daughter and that by the same occasion they were grandparents for six years now, my mother was really happy seeing her but I think that my father didn’t accept just yet the big age leap I just forced upon him, he still look pleased though. We were still standing outside so my mother invited us to enter, it was a bit weird of being invited to enter the house you once lived in but I didn’t make any remarks.
My mother kept repeating how much they missed me and my father just nodded at everything she said, I felt a bit bad for leaving them like this and it looks like it was painful for them too but I guess that we were fine too. My father finally asked why I wasn’t with my girlfriend and that’s when I told them everything about our story, it took quite a lot of time but I guess I made a good choice of telling them now since I wouldn’t have to tell it again to my daughter since she was listening too. My mother cried a few times when she heard that she died, she said that I could have came back to home since I was in a difficult position with the child and being alone. I told her that I thought once of coming back but I thought that I had to get through this alone and I overcame that challenge that life has set for me, I can now come back here stronger. I was also reticent to come back here and ask for help since I wasn’t sure if you were mad at me or something. My mother immediately talked back and said “We will never be mad at you.”, I looked to the ground and replied “I know…”.
I’m certain that some parents can be mad at their children, but I don’t think it’s possible that they would ignore them if they’re in trouble or need help. That’s what parents are for after all, they’re going to support you during your whole life, not only while you live under their roof. I looked at my daughter to see if she understood that. She probably didn’t but it wasn’t important for now, she would probably, like me, find it out when it matters the most. My mother said that we were welcome to stay here but I said that we won’t be staying long, I came here because I had some business to do around here and I wanted to meet them too at the same occasion, I had a job and a house in the other town after all. Both my parents said that they were really proud of me that I became so independent on my own, when I still lived with them they thought I would never be able to do something on my own and I would probably spend the rest of my life day-dreaming around. Well the last point wasn’t really far from reality I must say
We had ate dinner with them and after some casual chat that took all afternoon, we left the familial house, saying that we still had some business to take care of. They bid us farewell and good travels as they begged for us to visit again. I promised to come back sometimes as I waved my hand at them. My daughter was still surprisingly energetic from the boring day she just had, well I guessed so since we mostly just talked and she listened to us, it wasn’t probably really interesting for a child of her age, or so I thought.
“I had lots of fun today!” she said with a cute smile. “I like your parents, they are nice persons”
That statement really surprised me but I couldn’t do anything else but smile back at her. We entered the town and the crowd was still pretty dense, she held my hand tight. I quickly noticed that compared to the other town, I didn’t know anybody in this town, even if I lived here longer, that felt a bit weird. I guess that’s what we feel as a foreigner and I think I was ready to leave this town now, without regrets. We couldn’t leave just now thought, we still had one thing to do here before leaving, I bought some bread at the store and we walked in direction of the hill.
The sunset was beautiful as always and her red hair was glowing more than ever, it almost felt like it was ablaze. She frolicked to the top of the hill as I followed her in a quick pace, she sat down at the top and looked at me with wide eyes. I gave her a chunk of bread that she instantly started to nibble on.
“What are we doing here?” she asked with an interrogative tone.
“Shhh!” I replied, holding one finger in the air to signal we had to wait. “We’ll have to wait until the stars show themselves to start talking.” She simply nodded at my quick explanation while eating her bread. This scenery was worth dreaming for, I was there standing on the top of the hill I stood six years ago with the girl I loved with all of my heart, it brings back so many memories my heart aches with pain and joy, I don’t really know how to react right now but that doesn’t really matter right? I took my daughter in my arms and hugged her with all the might I could permit myself to use against her frail body, I cried a little on her shoulder and she looked at me but she didn’t say anything, I think that she kind of felt what I was feeling right now or maybe she only waited for the stars to fill the sky before talking.
I was there, standing on the top of the hill, with the girl I now loved with all of my heart, my most precious treasure and my blessing from the heavens. I made a promise to myself that I would cherish her for the rest of my life. I looked deep in her silent eyes and wondered one more time if it was possible if she reincarnated as her daughter, was that even possible? I don’t know and I don’t think I ever will, unless she starts telling me stories about Palsie or something! The sun was down now and the sky started to be dark, the moment I’ve waited for so many years will now begin in a few minutes, I was really excited and emotional right now, so much that I couldn’t contain myself, I whispered to her ear “It’s my turn now to tell you a story”.
Suddenly, all the moments I passed with her flashed again before my eyes, I wish that she could see the two of us tonight, on the hill that hosted so many of our discussions about anything, could have we imagined that a few years from there I would still be there with our child? I think that if she told me that she foresaw this, I wouldn’t have believed her, or would have I? I still don’t know but I always ended up believing her and I guess that it was the right decision after all. Well it wasn’t impossible that she actually saw us, I will never be able to know for sure if she’s watching upon us or not but I can still think that she does right?
Then, the first stars started to show themselves, revealing their bright side to the veil of the night, illuminating the sky like lighthouse to the ones who are lost in their lives, I hope more people can find the answers they’re looking for in those inspiring constellations, they mean so much that what they look like but unfortunately, most people forget about the stars, that’s a shame.
She raised her little arm to the sky, trying to reach out something that wasn’t there, she looked at me, unsure if she could talk or not. I nodded at her, holding back the train of feelings and tears I had ready to burst out. She spoke.
“I… I wonder how far they are.” she asked.
“T-the stars?” I asked with a voice that trembled so much I felt the earth itself was shaking.
I hope this never ends.