When I woke up this morning, snow was falling all around me. A slight smile appeared on my face as I remembered the dreams I had during the past month. I went outside and slipped a hand out of my coat’s pocket to gather a few snow flakes, they quickly melted to the heat of my hand that I closed immediately after. A name suddenly came to my mind, it was the name of a girl I met a few years ago, actually I don’t even know for how much time we’ve known each other but we sure had a lot of fun together, I even considered her as my little sister and she would call me her brother. It’s funny because I always lived alone with my mother so the idea of having a sibling was pretty special to me, I felt like I had to give all my heart and soul to protect her. Her name is Kai and depending where you stand on the planet, this name might sound funny to your ears, but it means a lot to me.
A few months ago, I’ve lost contact with Kai because she had to leave the country and we couldn’t see each other again. That would normally be fine with me, I knew she would come back eventually and we would tell each other how we spent our lives during our separation, we would laugh a lot and be happy to be together again. Unfortunately I learned a bit before she left that she had this heart illness, her heart stopped growing as a child and it was now tired of working this hard for a body too grown for his capacity. Learning that pained me a lot and she also subtly implied that she might die if it stays that way. I had a lot of hope in her.
When she came back, she wasn’t the same person anymore. She looked very weak and seemed to have lost hope in life. I don’t think I ever had the opportunity to tell her what I did that was so awesome when she was gone. I felt somewhat uneasy to see her act like this. I started to talk with one of her best friends and he also told me that she was being weird and that he felt bad for this. I totally lost contact with her during the summer this year, I would try to at least let her know that I care about her and that I’m worried but I wouldn’t get any answer.
I received an email once, from her, it was her that was telling me that she was sorry that we couldn’t talk, she fell really sick and had to go back to her homeland, she said to not worry too much, she would come back eventually when she would be alright. I once again believed strongly in her and hoped that she would be fine, I replied to her a long email, telling her all about what I felt about this and how much I wanted her to get better. But once again, I received no reply.
It’s only when I finished school, everything in my life was doing good, that I received a final email from her. She said she came back, she read my email many times and she would cry every time, she said she was glad to have somebody like me in her life and I was very important to her. She said she was doing a bit better and to not worry too much. I really wanted to not worry and I replied with a short email this time, saying that I was really happy that she came back and I hope she would be okay soon, I told her a bit how I progressed in my life but I didn’t said too much.
That was the last time I heard from her, four months ago.
I’ve put back my hand into my coat to shield my hand from the cold winter, I went to take the bus that brings me to my job, staring at the morning sky. I don’t know where you are right now Kai, I’m not even sure how to know the proper way to tell you what I want to say right now. I’m always thinking about you even if it had been a lot of time already, I will remember you no matter what. I want you to know that I wrote something for you, it’s not a fancy email or an endless conversation like we had before. I wrote a novel, in about one month. I guess you could say it’s somewhat based on what we lived together, to some extent since we never have been this serious together and never had a child either, haha… but I felt like this story revolved around me and you. I would be blessed by the gods if you ever read it, honestly I hate to say such things but I don’t even know if you’re alive right now, I will try by all means to let this reach you and I hope that one day, our paths will cross again.
Even if it’s not in this life.
I kept my eyes at the sky, the light was barely crossing through the grey clouds. I wonder when I will fall asleep again, I can’t wait to see how it will come out, what story will I be able to tell about my dreams. I can’t wait until my world revives.
Greetings, YanEnRogne here.
First of all, I would like to thank you personally, person who reads my story. I hope you appreciated reading it but don’t worry if you didn’t like it, I’m quite aware that everybody’s got different tastes and that’s all right, I’m still really glad that you went through it anyways.
I would also like to say that this is my first novel ever (yay!) and I decided to write it in english even though my main language is french. I had a few reasons to do so but I apologize of all the mistakes I could have made.
I don’t feel that I have to describe myself as you have seen me on every page of this novel, I will instead talk more about this story. This was written for NaNoWriMo, if you aren’t really familiar with this, it stands for National Novel Writing Month and it means pretty much what the name says, the goal is to write an entire novel in one month. The only restrictions are that it has to be a fictional story and it must have 50,000 words in it and today on the last moments of November I can say proudly that I have succeeded. Though the story is fictional, my inspiration is some life experience that I will never forget.
If you know that girl called Kai that has this heart disease, please make her read the story, thanks!
Oh also, tell her I love her.